Wherever the Wind Blows
by Daruki
Summary: Sheba broods on the search for her parents, as well as Jenna's. Includes some ingame scenes, during and after the lighting of Mars Lighthouse. Some hints of Lighthouseshipping, oneshot. Some angst, please R&R.


Disclaimer: I don't own Golden Sun, though I have yet to understand why disclaimers are so important to put in every fic while you know that it's highly unlikely that a Camelot employee would come across a Golden Sun fanfic where the author forgot to put a disclaimer and sue the said author for it. Er... On to the fic! ..;

A/N: Sheba's point of view, takes place during The Lost Age. Hints of Dustshipping/Lighthouseshipping, or whatever you call the Sheba and Felix pairing. My first attempt at a real fanfic, so comments and reviews are appreciated. Thanks for reading!

* * *

The sun was warm and bright, the wind, light and refreshing; the clouds were slow and lazy and the waves, soft and easy. Pressed against the starboard's supports, I gazed out at the sea absently while the cool ocean breeze brushed my cheeks softly: this was definitively a beautiful day. It would be on days like this that children would go out to run, play and laugh; it would be on days like today that the laziest of the people may be tempted to go out for a short and enjoyable walk (I'm thinking mostly of the Alhafran mayor here). And yet, it is also on a bright and sunny day like today that leaves me, idle aboard the Lemurian ship, brooding with the darkest of thoughts. It was when I have nothing to do and to think of that my mind somehow replays the most terrible events that I have experienced, the worst nightmares my imagination could create and above all, my loneliness and my desire to find my true parents, my real home and my rightful origins. The harder I try to fill this emptiness, the hollower I feel. This feeling, it haunts me at every possible occasion and the harder I try to shake it off, the harder it grips onto me.

I looked down at the sea as a soft breeze rushed past me. It definitively wasn't as pretty for me as for everyone else. I sighed; if only I could go wherever the wind blows…

"Aren't you happy, Felix? We'll be at the Jupiter Lighthouse soon, and then it'll be a step closer to free our parents and save Weyard!" A cheery voice sounded from the cabin as a tired-looking Felix came out, pushing the door open with Jenna enthusiastically hanging on his tail. I turned around. Well, looks like that at least someone is enjoying this day…

"Yes, yes… I know, I know. Now why don't you go take some fresh air while I go and see if we're heading in the right direction?" And with that, Felix headed to the ship's bow, shaking Jenna off as the red-haired Mars adept took in a deep breath and looked happily around. At that point, I decided to stare back at the sea. Jenna is a lot more cheerful than usual, and she's still nagging Felix. That's nothing new. Now let's just hope that she goes to bothers Picard instead and leave me alone. I'm not feeling very social just about now.

"Hey Sheba! Wonderful morning, isn't it?"

…Well, so much for that. One could always hope. I sighed, turned around and returned a glare to the beaming Jenna. "…What is it now? Don't you have anything better to do?"

Her eyes widened slightly and her smile began to fade as she cocked a brow. "…Someone's in a grouchy mood today…" My glare turned darker. Well obviously, miss observant. I was hoping that she would now leave me alone after that welcome, but instead, her frown turned into worry.

"…Sheba, are you alright? I mean, this isn't like you … is there…?" She hesitated.

She was right. This isn't me, as I rarely ever show that side. I shook my head, regaining some sense. "I…I'm sorry. I'm just not feeling very well."

Her looks brightened. "Seasick? After all this time we've spent on the ocean?"

I shook my head in a manner that immediately took her out of that misconception, as an awkward silence enveloped us. The ship creaked, the waves crashed, the wind blew harder and the seagulls cried.

"…Jenna," I started.

"…Yes?" She looked at me inquisitively. "May I…help you?"

"…This might be a bit awkward for me to ask, but…" The wind was blowing and my voice felt unreal. What's going on?

"Sure, go ahead, I won't mind," she cut me off, giving me a stranger look by the second.

"Okay then. …Say, when… well, 3 years ago, when you thought your parents and Felix were dead, how… how did you feel?" I didn't even know why I asked. I didn't even consider what impact a question like this would have on her; it wasn't the kind of question to ask at all. And yet… The wind. It brushed my hair against my cheek and kept blowing, never stopping…

"…Why would you ask me that?" Her expression was changing. I didn't pay any attention.

"I'm just curious. Besides, you said that I could ask you anything, didn't you?" Sheer insolence. I didn't even pay attention. I felt as if the wind was carrying me slowly away, away from my companions, away from this place…

If she came up on board happy, that joy was now obviously gone. She stared at me incredulously and gagged, as her surprise slowly turned into a mixed expression of pain and anger.

"…W-what did you say?"

"I asked you a question. That night that I've heard you guys talking about, the night when you thought that you lost everything… How was it like? You said it was okay, didn't you" I felt vacant and thoughtless as the words crossed my lips. What did I say? The wind seemed to be howling now.

"…How I felt? …How I felt when I lost everything?" Rage was definitively catching up. "What do you mean, how I FELT? Can't YOU imagine what's it like, when you thought that you lost your whole family, all those who were dear to you?" Her tone grew sharper. "How would YOU feel, when the realization of eternal loneliness hits you, all the pain and sorrow? And why are you asking me all this out of the blues, anyway?" She herself blinked as she said out aloud her last sentence, finally noticing just how odd it was for me to ask her a question like this, all of a sudden.

I stayed silent, feeling vacant as the wind kept on blowing. The ruby-haired teen nudged me slightly, more puzzled than angry now. It was then that I finally snapped out of my daze and cleared my head of these random thoughts about the wind. I blinked, detached my gaze from the sea and turned around to find Jenna, her look more and more questioning by each passing moment. My eyes widened as the realization of the full meaning of what I have just said in the past few minutes crashed on me.

"H-hun? Er, why-what? I-I asked because I…" I gibbered as my head drooped and my eyes fell on the deck floor, too embarrassed and ashamed to say anything else. The wind seemed less loud now.

She took me squarely by the shoulders and shook me. "Sheba. Sheba, look at me. Are you ok? What's wrong?"

I took a deep breath and finally gathered enough courage to raise my head and face her. Her look is now concerned and patient, waiting for an explanation. I finally found enough breath to answer.

"…I-I'm sorry. It's just that I… I always wanted to know where I come from and who are my real parents. …N-No, that's not exactly it. I...I've always wondered what it was LIKE, to have parents to care for you, to be with you, t-to… love you. I…Back in Lalivero, Faran treated me like his own daughter, but… It's just not the same, it wasn't… I mean, everyone kept calling me the "God's child" while all they know is that I fell off the sky… So that pain… That kind of sorrow you mentioned, about losing a close family member… I don't know it. I never will. And I don't think that I was even completely conscious when I asked you that question… I-I should have known better. I'm sorry." I started to feel a bit dizzy, but now that I have this weight lifted from my heart, it felt better, lots better. The breeze helped me cool down, too.

Jenna looked stricken. "N-No, don't apologize-I mean, I'm sorry, not you… I should have seen that coming… I-" She took my hand in hers as she kept apologizing frantically. I shook my head.

"…No, it's alright. It's not your fault, it's just the way how things turned out," I replied, freeing my hand from her grasp. "I...I just need to be alone for a while. I'll be ok." I tried to smile, but it didn't quite work out. The wind was like a whisper now.

"But-"

That's when a solid hand gripped on Jenna's arm. She turned to find her brother, staring at her with a look that said it all.

"But-" Jenna began again. Felix shook his head. Jenna nodded, understanding her older brother's request as she pulled herself slowly away from me and smiled sadly. "…Take care, then."

"Thanks. I will." I returned the smile, feeling my eyes soften. She nodded one last time, and then walked away to the bow of the ship as I turned around to face the ocean once again. Felix was still there. He's probably going to ask me if I'm fine, I thought tiredly.

"…If you need help, we'll all be here for you." He gave me an understanding look, smiled amiably and turned around to pursue his sister. I jerked my head to stare back at him. Now that reaction was the last one that I'd expect from him. Or was it? Wasn't he always calm and collected?

"Felix!"

He turned around.

"…Thanks." I muttered, suddenly feeling foolish to have called him out like that.

"You're welcome," he grinned back, not missing the fact that I was flushing. And with that, he continued to head for the ship's bow, not looking back. I, however, looked at him until he caught up with Jenna as both began to converse calmly. I shook my head, closed my eyes and reopened them on the horizon.

This time, I was staring out at the sky as the wind now softly murmured in my ears. It was a beautiful day indeed.

* * *

Jenna was crestfallen and her eyes were starting to water. Isaac and Felix both had that dark look of nostalgic regret and deep sorrow in their eyes, for they both clearly knew what they where up against the moment they raised their sword. Jenna didn't, and what just happened was something that no human could have stomached on the spot; it was simply too much for her. Too much for us all. She gulped down a sob as she cradled the head of her mother in her lap, her left hand clutching fiercely her father's right arm.

The snowstorm was fierce, the wind was positively howling and the Mars Lighthouse was lit, but not without a price. It was only now that all of us, minus Isaac and Felix, found out that the Doom Dragon was indeed Felix and Jenna's parents and Isaac's father. It was only now, lifeless as they crouched in front of us, that we understood what the so-called miracle and last trial that we had to face was, the one that the Wise One just made us go through. Jenna, whose main goal on this whole journey was to be reunited with her parents, is more than just broken. She was devastated. The Earth Adepts hid their emotions well, but it was obvious to everyone what they were thinking and feeling by just looking into their eyes. It was the end. And yet, even now, we cannot mourn in peace, for the Mars Lighthouse was to collapse at any given moment. We need to flee, now. Even the wind tells me so.

"…Jenna." I approached my friend and shook her gently. "Jenna, we need to go. This place isn't safe anymore. It's going to erupt. Come on, pull yourself together…"

She wasn't responding to my calls, her eyes vacant. And at that moment, when I touched her, I felt what she felt. It wasn't nice, and I blame it on how much control I've earned over my Jupiter powers in the past few months thanks to this journey; I can feel my comrade's emotions by simply touching them. And Jenna, right now, could barely contain her emotions… The pain, the thought of losing her parents for not the first but the second time, and the second shattering of her whole world. I finally understood what that feeling was like, this hollowness that surpasses by far my own. While I might not have asked for the power to sense my friends' emotions, it did help me understand them, and how small my own troubles were compared to the pain that my friend was going through right now. There is no pity, only understanding. I shook Jenna harder, remembering the times when she comforted me aboard the Lemurian ship, when she made me smile and cheered me up. I cleared my mind and took a deep breath; it was my turn to help her now.

"Jenna. JENNA. We need to leave, NOW. If we hurry, we might have a chance to revive them. Right now, this place is dangerous and it might just take all of our lives if we don't leave. And besides, this isn't the Jenna I know; the real Jenna'd take her parents and help everyone get out of here as fast as she can. So where's the Jenna I know?" I shook her again, harder this time. The light was staring to come back into her eyes.

"She's right. Jenna, get up. We need to leave or we WILL all die here," Isaac said firmly as he and Felix started to prepare the Retreat spell. Felix nodded.

Jenna is now fully recovered. "…You're right, you're all right. The top priority now is for all of us to get to safety. I'm sorry to have been totally spaced out. I'm fine now." She rose and softly deposited her mother's head on the ground while still clutching her father's hand. She rubbed her eyes and grinned at me. "After all, I can cry all I want later, right? Thanks for bringing me back, Sheba."

I tried my best to beam at her. "…Yes, we'll all mourn later. But for now, we need to get out of here. And don't thank me, I'm just returning the favor. So welcome back!"

She smiled. "…All right, we're not done yet, so let's do this!"

I took her father's other hand as all 11 of us made a circle, including the Valeans' parents. We were all ready to get out of here, pronto. The Lighthouse won't be waiting for us to explode on, after all. Yet despite the rush, the wind now felt softer. It's a good sign.

* * *

The most acute description of the "resurrection" of Kyle and Jenna's parents, according to the Proxians, would be nothing less of a miracle. It also had something to do with the fact that they were Venus and Mars Adepts and it was the Mars Lighthouse's powers that restored them, but it was still a bit complicated. Everything is complicated coming from Kraden's mouth. All I know is that we were all overjoyed. Even I felt happy for Jenna, Felix and Isaac. At least they got their parents back all safe and sound, and now we could all go to Vale, to finally see what Isaac, Garet, Jenna and Felix's hometown was like, since they Valeans told us all so much about it during the trip back.

But still, I felt something. And to be completely honest, I think it was jealousy. They all had their parents back, and now, only I have to continue searching for mine. Kraden's story, after we left Contigo, did make me feel better, but that feeling didn't last long. I was soon plunged down into a dark hole all over again. The only hint I possessed, the only glimmer of hope that I had in Jupiter Lighthouse, was now completely gone. But my friends kept me going and standing, and the siblings shared my pain. Picard understood it too, since he too has lost his mother only recently. But this sudden jolt of joy… I pitied and laughed at myself, at this feeling that wishes so adamantly to meet my real parents. That desire was foolish, even childish. And yet, it was natural. I certainly was not going to ruin Jenna and Felix's day by confessing my pathetic self-pity just because they were happy; it's my own problem and I'd get over this jealousy. …Well, eventually. And so, I smiled. I smiled for them, smiled for their reunion, and smiled for their fortune. I kept quiet about myself.

And yet, this happiness was not lasted. Only had Jenna, Felix and Isaac found their parents that upon their return to Vale, Garet had lost his. The village of Vale, after the lighting of all four lighthouses and the eruption of Mt. Aleph, was utterly destroyed. All his family, his grandfather, grandmother, mother, father, big sister and little brother… They were all gone. Even Isaac's mother, Dora, was victim of the incident. At that time, I felt sick. It was like a really big and bad joke. First, Jenna loses her parents and her brother, only to find Felix and learn that her parents were still alive 3 years later. Isaac also thought that his father was dead, but learns that he lives a bit later too. Then, just when they thought that their parents would be saved and the Mars Lighthouse lit, the Wise One made them slay the very ones they sought to protect, only to again, find them to be miraculously restored thanks to the Lighthouse's powers. And now, when they were finally going to be all reunited, for real this time, it was Garet's entire family and Isaac's mother's turn to "not be there". It was a REALLY bad joke. Picard's mother died and my parent's whereabouts were completely unknown, but this was simply ridiculous. I mean, I do envy them all to have such completed families, but this…

It was probably because of my mind-reading powers that made me the first to notice them all, alive and well. The blond woman that I immediately identified as Isaac's mother and that whole bunch of people with red hair, probably Garet's family members (He sure had a big family…). They stood there, smiling, and the little boy was snickering at his older brother's devastated look.

If I learned anything of human failings from Faran's words and Babi's actions, it was that humans were two things: Greedy and Selfish. These were two of mankind's greatest failings, and they're in everyone. The nicest and kindest of people might find themselves doing something selfish without even noticing, and the most generous might do something greedy without batting an eyelash. It was my selfishness that manifested itself right there and then, as the jealousy that I sought to dispel hit me in full force. Gone? No, they were all there. Dora and Garet's family were all in good condition. In fact, it's as if they've never been better, Dora seeing her son and husband back in full health and the mayor of Vale finding his son without a scratch. They all had that glint of sheer joy in their eyes; waiting in anticipation for the ones they treasure the dearest to notice them. It was right there and then that resentment hit me fully in the face, and that was probably what ultimately drove me to say these heartless and cruel words.

"Aww… Poor baby…"

The worst was that I was fully conscious of the meaning of the words when they came out of my lips. Jenna, shocked and also stricken by the sudden loss of her childhood friend's closed ones, didn't hesitate to reprimand me as her indignation went flaring.

"Sheba, what's gotten into you! How could you say that to Garet?"

"Tee hee! I wonder…" Mia was the second one that spotted Garet's family, but I think she misinterpreted my words. But still, it didn't matter. I felt shot.

And yet I smiled still, as the realization that everyone was alive and well hit the rest of the party. Their reunion quickly erased my words from everyone's memory, for now they were happy. All happy and all reunited. I shall smile again, smile again for them, for their fortune, for their future, for them all. Let their future be blessed, and let those who came to the world happy stay happy, and hopefully, leave happy as well.

I found it more than necessary to be on my own after the celebration had taken place. Everyone was chatting about the construction of a new Vale, and after a while, I excused myself out of the room, under the pretext that I needed some air. The forests around Vale were all very quiet, so they were perfect places when one needed to be alone and some time to think. I sat down on a nearby log and sighed. They might be reunited, but I knew that my journey hasn't ended. I mean, I was happy for them. Really, I feel glad that they were all together. But while this is their journey's end, for me, this is just the beginning. Maybe that now, with Psynergy restored to the land, I might have a bigger chance of finding my true origins… I closed my eyes and sent a silent prayer, praying for everyone's happiness, a bright future and maybe some guidance to lead me to the goal of my own path.

If I thought that I came out alone, I was proven wrong when I opened my eyes again. Felix, as silent as a cat, followed me out and is now right behind me. Noticing the fact that I noticed him, he sat down right next to me wordlessly.

I would embark on a journey to search for what has always eluded me, that I planned it out a long time ago. Well, now's a good time to tell him as any…

"… I would have to leave this place soon…" I was staring out into the forest when I said that, so I didn't see his reaction. Plus, there was no need to elaborate. I know that he knew what I meant. About leaving, that is. Then, I'd be free and follow the wind, wherever it might blow and wherever it might lead me.

"…I suppose it's only natural for you to look after your own parents now as well, since this grand quest is finally over…" Felix finally started after a short moment of silence. "And if I might ask, where would you go?" He asked after a small pause. So he had an idea of what I was planning.

"Well…yes, I suppose. I think I'll drop by to Lalivero first, and then set out, to wherever the wind blows. If you would allow me to take the Teleport Lapis… It would be much faster… But, how did you know?" I had to ask.

"…It was too obvious. That's your main goal all along, wasn't? And about the Lapis, it's not up to me to decide, but I'm sure that the others will allow it."

It was followed by an odd and uncomfortable silence. Felix coughed.

"But still… Won't you stay for at least a bit?" He finally asked.

I stared back at him in surprise.

"…I mean, we just all got back, and yet you guys never got to see the real splendor of Vale, now that it's been blown to pieces and all… We were going to ask you all to stay with us for a while, if not just to see how… er, beautiful the surrounding forests are? I mean, you guys won't have to help in the rebuilding, just stay around and have some fun before we split apart for good? …" Felix was really trying to phrase an invitation to stay properly, but he was doing a pretty poor job out of it. Still, his words brought some realities back up to me. Now that the Valeans were reunited, they probably would like to spend some quality time together. And if they were really planning to ask us all to stay… Mia, Picard and Ivan more than likely wouldn't refuse. I shouldn't either.

"…Okay, that came out wrong," Felix grimaced, noticing my frown as I myself brooded on what he was trying to say. "What I meant is that… Can't you stay a little bit? Even Ivan said that he'd do what he can to help us rebuild the town –I am not saying that you should help too!– But right now, don't be so quick to leave. You know what? I'd ask Jenna and we'd all help you search once this is over, but have some fun for now and stick around a bit, won't you?" He grinned, an obvious and bad effort to cheer me up. What's with the "I" and "We"? Nevertheless, he was right.

"…Felix. Why can't you just say that you want the whole party to stay and have some fun before we all split apart? Plus, you know you will have troubles convincing Jenna first if embarking on another adventure is planned out in your future. I mean, I DO appreciate the offer and I do understand that you would want to spend some time with your family and friends, now that everyone's together…" I smiled ruefully at him and sighed. " Sorry for being so blunt and selfish, though you were trying too hard to not phrase things like they are. Don't play mind games with me, you know you'd lose."

He sighed and chuckled. "Can't hide anything from you, can I? Yes, I suppose. Stay with us for a while, and then maybe more of us, not just Jenna and me -though I WOULD have to convince her first, wouldn't I?- would come with you. Picard can always come and lend us his ship if his bones aren't feeling too old to endure some more time on board at sea… Or the sky, for that matter." He grinned openly, making reference to that episode when I myself kept nagging at the poor Lemurian for his real age. I chuckled.

"No, I know everything. And yes, I'd stay, since it is selfish for me to go out on my own just because you're all happy… Forgive me. But all right, I would stay here for a bit more and get a better idea of just how you used to live," I conceded. "But you watch out now and don't disappoint me or make me regret my choice!" I added, somewhat unsure if it was the right choice, though I was willing to give it a shot.

A glint of amusement appeared in the corner of his eyes. "I would never! Why, we'd make the place so good that you wouldn't want to leave if you were FORCED to!"

"Oh really? What makes you so sure?" I scoffed, unconvinced yet also amused.

"Trust me on this one, you won't regret it! Want to bet that you would grow to love Vale in less than a month?" The grin widened.

"Is that a challenge? And so full of yourself? Alright then, I'll gladly stay and we'll see how you do, Felix!" I was laughing by then. Looks like it'll still be a while before I can go to wherever the wind blows. "Alright then, you're on!"

Did I even realize back then that I was betting my future and my happiness on the line? Probably not. But does it really matter? Not the least bit. After all, I'm happy NOW, and there's really no point in asking for more, now is it?


End file.
